Some Misty Years Ago

Back when I started updating the blog with periodic regularity several months ago I was trying to find a niche - well, not find so much as carve one for myself. I already feel like I can write incessantly about whatever the hell I want to without any problem - that's my niche. Carving that niche into something notable, well, that's just a different story altogether.

This post is certainly not going to appeal to the masses - but it's going to serve a cathartic purpose that I know I have mentioned in previous posts.

There's a couple things I've been involved with or witnessed or seen that I just never thought I'd ever see in my entire life - and I'm only 24 years old! Right at the top of that list was being the best man in my buddy's wedding. I'm sure that Max and Katie's wedding day was the best day of their lives, and I can share that sentiment!!!

Somewhere, floating in, "Wow - that really happened to me?" land is the fact that I actually have a Bachelor's Degree. For most of my pre-college days I was pretty much 100% sure I was never going to get a degree. I was going to be a famous writer/filmmaker blah blah blah - lots of fantastical notions running 'round my head. And here I am now a graduate student.

I don't want to call this the "breaking through adversity" portion of my life, but in a way it was: getting out of community college. It's actually quite simple - sitting in Parma, Ohio, at Cuyahoga Community College, it wasn't the degree that seemed elusive to me...it was happiness that seemed unattainable.

Happiness came in small, sporadic instances at Tri-C. It was the car ride with to and fro with Max and his sister, it was the little Max-isms in English class ("The doctor is in..." on the first day of class when Dr. Surace strolls into the room), it was the ribbing from Dr. Rokicky for sleeping through her entire class in the previous semester, it was skipping out of the second to last class of summer Spanish to smoke a cigar with a classmate that was getting married the next day and he was going to miss the last class of the semester.

Several different things happened that convinced me to snap the hell out of my, "I was supposed to be a screenwriter/rock star/Cleveland Cavalier" mentality and here I sit...happy.

*Warning* *Warning* *Springsteen Stuff Ahead*

There's plenty of poignancy in Springsteen's extensive catalog. A lot of it has helped me make sense of things I'm feeling and things that are happening in society etc... A lot of what I have learned about him is that he and I have similar influences (one example of this is that a few years ago I discovered that before I ever heard a single cut of a Springsteen album I was obsessing about movies that would inspire him to write some of the songs that I would come to greatly identify with many years later).

Bruce's stuff has always been rather autobiographical, and that has helped facilitate the intense connection all us crazy fans have to him and the music. That's always been apparent to me and many, many others even before I ever figured it out.

I mentioned some things I never thought I'd be able to say I did or be a part of. Well, in less than 24 hours I get to add another one to that list.

I'm going to see Bruce Springsteen & the E-Street Band play in Giants Stadium in East Rutherford, New Jersey. This will be the last concert played at Giants Stadium before it's torn down after the football season is over. They will also be playing the Born in the USA album in its entirety. (Did I mention he is playing 5 consecutive shows there to send that place out in style?)

Giants Stadium (the venue) and the Born in the USA (the album) made Bruce "The Boss."

Getting to see Bruce play in Jersey is one of those little fairy tale myths that circulates amongst Boss fanatics. The snobs all say Philly and Boston are the best places to see him - the really snobby ones claim that nowadays the only place to see Bruce is in Europe. But the purists all agree: it's all about Jersey. Bruce always pulls out the wild cards in Jersey. It's home for him. He feels at home on the stage no matter where he is, but when he's in Jersey he's literally in his backyard.

Bruce overcame his own adversity - much like I did in community college, haha! - and there's plenty of great coming-of-age stories to be found on his bootlegs. One of my favorites is the story he told throughout "Growing Up" at the 9/8/78 Agora, Cleveland show.

The story goes like this:

His mom and dad had a heart-to-heart with him and demanded that he put the guitar down and get a real job...his dad wanted him to be a lawyer and his mom suggested he be an author. So Bruce has to go talk to a priest to help assist in this search - and his dad tells him, "Don't you tell him nothing about the God damned guitar!" After he and the priest talk for a while the priest tells Bruce he needs to speak directly to God. He left Bruce with one more piece of advice: "Don't tell HIM nothing about that God damned guitar!" So Bruce goes to talk to God. It's just a dark hill next to a cemetery. Bruce is unsure this is where he's supposed to go, but he goes up the hill anyway. So he goes to the top and there's tons of people everywhere. He kneels down to talk to God and explains that everyone is telling him to do these things he doesn't want to - all he wants is to play that guitar.

Then there's thunder and lightning.

After a silence there are three words that Bruce hears...

LET IT ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You see it's a silly fabricated exaggeration, but it's the code that Bruce formed for himself. It's what he's been telling us all along. People telling you not to do what you love? Well, that is unacceptable - it's up to you!

In what I may just consider to be the most beautiful way he's ever done it, Bruce reminded all of us of this very sentiment with his new song, "Wrecking Ball."

Bruce wrote this song specifically to commemorate the final shows at Giants Stadium. Lots of memories for him and the band there - and for the fans as well.

But this song goes far beyond simply being a love story for a football stadium.

So if you got the guts, mister

Yeah if you got the balls

If you think it’s your time

Then step to the line and

Bring on your wrecking ball

Bruce is telling us if we are met with a challenge, meet it face to face. It's our life and we are the ones that determine if we sink without a fight.

We know that come tomorrow

None of this will be here

So hold tight to your anger

Hold tight to your anger

Hold tight to your anger

And don’t fall to your fear

We can fade away into oblivion if we let go of our passions and succumb to the easily attainable and allow ourselves to do what is simple.

When your best hope and desires

Are scattered into the wind

And hard times come

And hard times go

And hard times come

And hard times go

And hard times come

And hard times go

And hard times come

And hard times go

And hard times come

And hard times go just to come again

The forces working against us will never seize. They may lessen, they may even hide. Nothing is easy. Nothing is handed to us. We will be challenged.

How can we possibly know what to do?

There's only one thing you can do - confront your adversaries, no matter how big or small.

You look at them and say:

Bring on your wrecking ball

Bring on your wrecking ball

C’mon and take your best shot

Let me see what you got

Bring on your wrecking ball

I'll be thinking and living this as I watch Bruce and the band take the stage for the last time ever at Giants Stadium tomorrow.

Now that I can cross seeing The Boss in Jersey off my list, I just have to go about continuing to be happy and those pesky little things like staying true to my passions.

I dare you to make me waver in this endeavor. Bring on your wrecking ball.

Scott.

"Wrecking Ball" by Bruce Springsteen - Video from October 2, 2009, performance at Giants Stadium.

*"Some misty years ago" is from the opening verse of "Wrecking Ball"